Archive for Oct, 2013

You are such an amazing treasure,
A real life angel,
I’m more or less nothing,
I’m simply a Tin Foil Knight,
My tin foil armour is all crumple and lacks a sheen,
My sword is nothing but a coat hanger,
My shield, a wooden plate,
My steed is pretty much imaginary,
I’m no lord, no baron, no king,
I’m just a Tin Foil Knight.

I’ll still be yours though,
With my shield I’ll protect you from dragons who make you cry,
With my sword I’ll fight off your nightmares,
With my armour and steed I’ll rush to your side,
I’m not much good but I’ll stand by you,
I’ll be yours,
Your very own Tin Foil Knight.

Picture 134


Posted: Oct 28, 2013 in Poems, Writing
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Tarquin was an ungrateful butler,

His Master, kindly,

His Master, wrong crowd,

His Master, unlucky,

His Master, impoverished,

His Master, unable to pay,

His Master, begging,

His Master, decapitated,

His Master, mutilated,

His Master, buried,

His Master, long gone,

His Mistress, next,

Tarquin was an ungrateful butler.


So it’s nearly Halloween so i thought i’d put a damn good horror style music video up. The video is “Living Dead Girl” by the excellent Rob Zombie!


Well, i was on the train coming back from Lee’s recently and in good fashion i remembered to keep a pen and notebook handy. While staring blankly out into the night, i came up with this out of nowhere. Most peculiar.


“It’d been a long time since i saw a sky like this. I couldn’t of asked for a more beautiful re-introduction. It was one of those perfect, movie set sunsets. You know the ones; the ones with a huge gleaming sun, the very definition of orange, the very definition of fire. I’d imagine the warmth of the sun would be such a perfect caress right now. So motherly, so comfortable. If only i could feel it. If only i could feel anything.

To think, a few days ago i had almost forgotten what daylight looked like. So long i had spent below ground. So long i had suffered. So long i had served “Them”.

I don’t remember what “They” did to me. I remember a blinding light followed by equally blinding pain. I don’t know what They did to me. I don’t know whether to thank Them or not. Since then I’ve been stronger, tougher and faster. Almost unnaturally so. 

With my bare hands, i can rend stone and steel. I can life boulders the size of cars. I can calculate problems at a rate surely impossible. Surely They have changed me, i couldn’t always do that, could i? I don’t bleed. What is bleeding? I don’t remember. I can see in the dark. Do humans do that? Why can’t i remember?

The sun changes from iridescent orange to foreboding red. Red? What’s that? Scarlet? I don’t know. So much red!

I can’t help peering around. The red is following my eyes! It’s on the sand. It’s at my feet. It’s… on my hands.

Blood. Is that blood? What’s blood? What are these shapes around me? Enemies? Shadows?


Awww, ain’t that soppy part 2

Posted: Oct 22, 2013 in Poems
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Aaaand here’s the other one.


“As she stands on the stage of life.

The spotlights highlight her beauty as she,

sings in her wondrous voice.

The crowd goes crazy, cheering.

But then she notices.

The crowd is one person.


Her biggest fan.”


Love you Lee! ❤ xxx

Yes yes, i know. It’s a love poem now shut it!


“As I look out across what I call my world.

I see lush rivers with serene waterfalls.

I see the beautiful sky,

Filled with a celestial sun.

I see the rolling hills,

The colossal mountains,

And the rich forests.

But then it all melts away.

I blink, and see you.

And then, I realize.

You are my world.”

It’s quite nice to reminisce, don’t you think? This was a random monologue i wrote a while back. It’s from the perspective of a man called Ryan Sargent who hunts monsters in the hopes of both documenting them and proving they exist.

“We humans think we rule this planet. We think we’re the most perfect example of life, superior to any other lifeforms. Technology has given us the crown, we are the kings and queens of Earth. When something seems too powerful for our bodies, we develop something to kill it. When a place is too far away for us, we create something to take us there. We don’t need to be afraid of most diseases, we can cure them. We don’t even need to be fearful of each other, our legal systems protect us. We can party and have fun without a care in the world. That homeless mans plea’s go away when you’re stoned after all. With so much going for us, what could ever go wrong? I mean, we are the kings and queens of Earth, but we distrust each other and fear the shadows.

We can kill that which is too powerful for us, but we can still die easily. We can get anywhere we want, but whats the difference? We can cure most diseases, but some still claim lives daily. And we can drown out the bad and scary things with alcohol and drugs, but they’re still there but we can’t see them right?

However, our biggest flaw is that, despite all the innovation and technology, we still fear the night. When we walk along darkened streets, we still see killers in the corners of our eyes. When we’re young, we still fear the things in the cupboard and under our beds. I found out this is a reasonable thing. The night is dangerous. All manner of things hide and stalk in our cities and towns. There are things that go bump in the night. It turns out the kings and queens of Earth have potential usurpers. When we walk along the streets, our eyes aren’t tricking us, there are things looking out from the shadowy alleys. When the cupboard rumbles with rage, is it the child’s imagination or is something actually there? I know it sounds mad. Ghouls, ghosts and witches exist. Monsters, warlocks and uncategorisable freaks exist. Once i was like you, i too rationalized the scary and strange things away. That shadow didn’t just move. That man just likes to wear black robes in the middle of summer. That whisper was just the wind.

I didn’t believe in any of that either. Events conspired to show me how wrong i was. Now i’ve seen creatures that you’ve only seen in your nightmares. I’ve seen abominations that would make you puke. Us humans don’t rule this planet, we just share it with them. Perhaps one day you’ll open your eyes to the truth too.

My name is Ryan Sargent and i document monsters.

Do you dare follow?”

So i was thinking the other day about writing about or world building a sort of cartoony fantasy world with a sort of Tim Burton-esque feel to it. In my minds eye, it was primarily black and white with the occasional red. A dreary landscape with lots of depressing characters and locations. The characters i imagined looking almost like the old Final fantasy sprites crossed with the Binding of Isaac characters.

I had an idea for a character called “Creep” who would be the protagonist. He was going to be a fairly ordinary young waiter who was thrust into a frankly mental city with many pop culture and video game references. One idea i had was having Creep infiltrate a suicide cult whose members topped themselves by dressing up in white and red robes and jumping off roofs a-la Assassin’s creed. That may give you an idea of the style of humor I’d intend to use for this.

Here is a very poor picture of poor little Creep.


I’m not quite sure what to call the style here (Tim Burton perhaps?) but I’d imagine the majority of characters would look like something along these lines in this fantasy world. So yes, just a random idea that came to me today.

What do you think?

Writing block

Posted: Oct 21, 2013 in Random thoughts
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How does one usually deal with writing block. I think it’s a writers greatest foe but i suppose sometimes it forces us to deal with other things. You know, like the dog that’s needing to be fed and the shower you were meant to have an hour ago. So maybe writing block isn’t all that bad, but it is still frustrating. I haven’t really found a good way to get over it yet. God knows I’ve tried though.

Any suggestions?


Posted: Oct 21, 2013 in Random thoughts
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I’ve not been on wordpress for quite some time. Things have been going on in my life that seem to keep distracting me from doing writing. I’m actually probably quite rusty by now. But in the coming weeks, i’m going to attempt to make some time for it.

We’ll see if i keep to that. Haha.